Open post

[knowsit]

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[nummytreat]

That's not what you cried to Willow all heartbroken. Hey. Hey, Spike. Are you and Drusilla still friends?

That's what I said throughout high school.

[knowsit]

Are you and that bint you cheated on still friends? I heard she impaled herself on my staircase. You really know how to treat a girl, mate.

Gonna go out and get myself a girl then. Make the most of that couch while I'm at it.

[nummytreat]

I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE TIED YOU UP.

When I come home, I'll throw you back down on that chair and tie you up, you asshole. Punch you while I'm at it.

[knowsit]

Kinky. Look at you, can't resist me.

Always did like myself some foreplay.

[nummytreat]

Ew.

Learn to tell punishment from seduction!

[knowsit]

Is there really a difference?

[nummytreat]

...yes!

Why are all vampires so messed up?

[knowsit]

No soul, mostly.

And we're all about the blood and suffering.

[nummytreat]

You are just a bunch of sadistic parasites with bad teeth.

[knowsit]

Yeah but we're sexy and immortal so

Who cares? We're never bored.

[nummytreat]

Not all vampires are sexy. Most aren't!

You just got lucky.

[knowsit]

You think I'm sexy?

Ha! Gay.

[nummytreat]

I don't personally think you are sexy. But I guess to some female women who are not me and who lack judgement. Visually.

[knowsit]

oh please, you wish you could land a bloke like me. I'm bloody gorgeous.

[nummytreat]

Please. If I wanted a guy, I could get a way more attractive one. Like. Angel level attractive.